My husband and I sat down together to watch a lecture about relationships and communication by Harville Hendrix a while back… (Yes, it is true that Husby is super. But I have to say that he had to be convinced to watch the lecture before he actually would. But that does not diminish his superness for sitting down and spending the time to watch that with me. End Husby praise.)
So the lecture began with an exercise where we were to turn to our neighbor and simply say, “You are awesome.” So Husby turns to me and repeats the words, “You are awesome.”
And I burst out in tears.
Like gushy, sobby, all-over-my-face-can’t-breathe tears.
And why? I’m sure you think it’s because I saw the love and appreciation in Husby’s eyes and really, truly believed him and his love for me. But the truth is that’s not exactly what happened.
I believed him. I surely did.
But, I believed, in that moment, that I was awesome.
And I was completely overcome with emotion.
Not because it was the first time a boy has told me I’m great or pretty or sexy or whatever, it wasn’t that simple.
It was because I knew it. Like really knew it. It wasn’t a first-time realization, it wasn’t just in that bravado sort of way that we use to coat our pain when we’ve been dumped. It was the fact that I know I’m awesome, and I always have been, always have known, but I’ve just always been so afraid to let myself believe that.
And now I do.
I do believe it. I know it’s true.
And I’m no longer afraid to know it.
So, hello World. I am Tiana, and I am awesome.
And you are too. Embrace it.